Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Blehhhh

Ahhh, Stinktown-on-the-James!

As I ventured out of the house to catch an omnibus to work I was assaulted by a veritable carnival of smells--and it's not even summer yet for Jah's sake. We don't tend to start really reeking until about July. July is when they delicately scent the city with a charming pork 'n' beans aroma. My tax dollars at work.

Not so this morning. Oh we had the usual early-morning exhaust fumes and that mysterious wee smell, but this was different. This was a deadly cabbage/sewage/fart combo which I hoped to holy hell didn't come barreling out of the backside of some living human being. If so, they were in dire need of medical help. I also think I detected a hint of brimstone in there.

My stomach still being a tad delicate wasn't exactly ready for this affront. I did manage to not hurl on any bus passengers or anyone at work, but I had a double handful of ye olde Tums from the medicine cabinet once I arrived.

Oh, and I am officially tired of food poisoning so I've decided I had cholera. No reason, except it sounds a bit more exotic than getting ahold of bad Mexican chicken.

You ever just invent something for no good reason? This is the final sketch for my new vehicle. I had to come up with something since hobos stole my rocketship and sold it for scrap, so rather than revisit the moon I've decided to travel by rail for a bit. I've even got room for extra provisions.

12 comments:

Sherri said...

You SURE that wasn't the nasty ass pattern books?

Severina said...

I haven't dared open up that container since Sat night. I think I'll give it a couple days or else there'll be a mound of barf in there with the books.

Scott said...

I didn't get sick and I ate chicken too. So there.

Mouse said...

Bad Mexican Chicken? Didn't the Aztecs sacrifice virgins to one of those in a temple or something? Maybe THAT is why you got sick.. you didn't offer the gods the proper gift before your feast.

Severina said...

I think it was because I mocked the ceiling mural.
Or I didn't offer my brother up to the Bad Chicken Gods.

Corvus said...

Cholera is characterized by rice water stools and has the capability to take you from "Hmm, that's uncomfortable" to "Oh sh*t, I'm dead!" in a matter of hours. I'd stick to the non-vibrio food-borne infection.

Oh, hi. I'm a random knitter/crafter/microbiologist who's been reading but not commenting for a while now. Don't mind my geekiness.

Obsidian Kitten said...

oh, she loves geekiness.

mind that you don't go into a prone position or she may scavenge your body parts for her vehicle.

methinks the goggles will look most becoming whilst you're astride the whale. (i assume one rides atop the whale, and not holding onto the onion top [or is it a large scallion?] as if it were the pommel of a saddle?)

Severina said...

I guess wishing I were dead and actually being dead are two entirely different things, not that I was able to tell the difference on Sunday. But I still love me some geekiness!

And I'm actually riding inside the whale and looking out the eyes. There's a nice, roomy compartment in the skull and the boiler resides in the belly where the guts used to be.

Don't ask me where I disposed of several hundred pounds of whale guts. I'm already in enough trouble for "borrowing" that giant onion.

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