Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Blehhhh

Ahhh, Stinktown-on-the-James!

As I ventured out of the house to catch an omnibus to work I was assaulted by a veritable carnival of smells--and it's not even summer yet for Jah's sake. We don't tend to start really reeking until about July. July is when they delicately scent the city with a charming pork 'n' beans aroma. My tax dollars at work.

Not so this morning. Oh we had the usual early-morning exhaust fumes and that mysterious wee smell, but this was different. This was a deadly cabbage/sewage/fart combo which I hoped to holy hell didn't come barreling out of the backside of some living human being. If so, they were in dire need of medical help. I also think I detected a hint of brimstone in there.

My stomach still being a tad delicate wasn't exactly ready for this affront. I did manage to not hurl on any bus passengers or anyone at work, but I had a double handful of ye olde Tums from the medicine cabinet once I arrived.

Oh, and I am officially tired of food poisoning so I've decided I had cholera. No reason, except it sounds a bit more exotic than getting ahold of bad Mexican chicken.

You ever just invent something for no good reason? This is the final sketch for my new vehicle. I had to come up with something since hobos stole my rocketship and sold it for scrap, so rather than revisit the moon I've decided to travel by rail for a bit. I've even got room for extra provisions.